Choking, and Biting, and Pain....OH MY!!!!!

You asked for a list of everything I need sexually to be happy in a relationship.  I don't think many of these will need explanation from me, so I am just going to put them all in list form.  They are in no particular order.  After you read this, I can rank them on a scale of 1-10 if needed.  (I'm also going to mix traditional "sex" activities, with traditional "play" activities here.  For us, right now, the two kind of blend.)


Here goes... 

• Biting  (Give and receive)
• Penetration/fingering, prefer fingers..hands...toys are ok..
• Kissing   (Give and receive)
• Breast play/"torture"  (Give and receive)
• Nipple play/torture    (Give and receive)
• Spanking
• Paddling
• Flogging/impact play.
• "Dirty" talk  (Give and receive)
• Oral   (Give and receive)
• Touching all over  (Give and receive)
• Cuddles and just being held  (Give and receive)
• Choking/Breath play
• Being allowed to squirt/orgasm  (I have a REAL difficult time with orgasm restriction.  Eventually my brain shuts off and I CAN'T come.)
• Knife/Bladeplay
• Rope/Being tied up/Restrained
• Blindfolds
• Strap On Fucking
• Feeling my lover's body weight on top of me.
• Pain of other types...clamps, pinching, whatever your twisted brain comes up with...(giggles)

For me when it comes to sex/sexual relationships, I separate along gender lines.  If you are my girlfriend, I will not have sex with any other women.  I may be with a man, but not another woman.  In the past year or so, sex has become a rather intimate and special thing for me, and not something I feel comfortable sharing with a lot of people.  I did a lot of that when I was younger.  It's just not me anymore.  In truth, I don't foresee me wanting to have sex with anyone but you at this point.  I love being with you.  I love the intimacy that we share.  Obviously, I don't see finding that with anyone else...so why bother?  Yes, I guess there is a "value" in just fucking for the sake of getting off, but if my mind is not "in it," I can't fully enjoy it.  I spend more time worrying about what I look like or what I sound like to ever actually be comfortable.  When I am not comfortable, I don't feel safe.  When I don't feel safe, I can never be naked and enjoy sex with someone without disassociating.  Disassociating is NOT good for me...I have learned this.   So again, why bother???  Make sense???